Installment #7: Climber's Fashion

While contemplating the virtues of the gussetted crotch, I came across this article at New England Bouldering. It made me glad that I only wear one pair of Prana pants. Maybe this isn't funny for those of you who aren't climbers, but this made me laugh out loud (and I never laugh out loud while surfing the web). Here's my favorite part:


7 Spandex
Little known fact: Wearing spandex does not make you appear to be skinnier. It makes you appear to be you, wearing spandex.
The spandex situation is similar to the Verve situation only worse. If you're a supermodel cool, go on with your bad self. Sadly you are reading my column on newenglandbouldering.com. Therefore you are not a supermodel. Therefore you may not wear spandex. Again the reasons for this should be obvious. Particularly if you are a man. TMI baby, TMI.
There are other reasons why spandex is a bad choice. The most common reason is that if your fashion sense is so bad that you are wearing spandex, then you are probably wearing white cotton underwear underneath it. This can be seen. It really does look as bad as it sounds. Think baby seals in an oil spill, or your parents running naked through your office. It's that bad. No really.